1. |
double dutch
01:43
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double dutch me
knee jerk reacting
ears recoiling
forgive my french braids
pivoting sideways
wince when you catch a glimpse
and since i've been the lone duck
seen outside my home stuck
frozen to a pole i licked
purely my fault i picked it
rarely i thought we'd kick it
really found myself inside out
cut the cord with my incisor
snow is falling i can see my breath again
it forms funny shapes as the icy air snaps back
creaky floorboards, moving forwards
hair standing on end
i put on my coat, my boots, my hat, my gloves, my scarf
you are my warmth
when my ears and nose are frosted
your sleeve is where my snot is
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2. |
topher
02:03
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christopher move over
you should've stuck your hand out
repeat after me: oo la la oo la la
love to jump bungee
haven't been with anyone longer than a few seasons
it's like life-like tv
wouldn't trust family
even moltisanti
if i were there
it'd been different
but you weren't
they deleted every scene you were in
christopher push over
you've got your head in the gutter
repeat after me: oo la la oo la la
love anyone but her
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3. |
lame time
02:27
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laying supine
in lame time
nothing aligns / sucks online / picking eglantines
lame time
everything's public knowledge apparently
is it a crime
keep archiving your hate speech daily
sorry i'm scrubbing my ink off
you're staining your stink on
at the same time
he's baking in the rays of his monitor displays
if doofuses got famous they'd get dropped cuz relayed phrases
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4. |
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21 celebrities who are surprisingly tall
21 celebrities who are surprisingly short
today i learned em
i'm shorter than bo burnham
now i know
that i'm taller than pacino
sifting through the schlock
quizzes define the way you talk
is it really surprising though?
bet you didn't know
jojo siwa towers over danny trejo
at least john cleese is 6 foot 5
tyler perry, too
wish i was one of these guys
sifting through the schlock
quizzes define the way you walk
is it really surprising though?
i could cuddle up with donald sutherland
interesting i could punt josh hutcherson
this journalism sticks to me like magnetism
but is it a mega waste of my megabyte space?
sifting through the schlock
quizzes define the way we fuck
is it really surprising?
really surprising?
really surprising though?
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5. |
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you can't put a capo on a flying v
you can't put a map across me
i'm scared to put stickers on it if it's impermanent
hate to see an ornament go to waste
and it won't even stick anyway
i don't mind that no
wondering if we'll ever be discussing
that shit ya done boy was really disgusting
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6. |
catturd
02:15
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oops i stepped in a cat turd
poops i scrapped off on the curb
hand me the hose and rinse me off
i can't propose since i look like a trough
if i can't cut it off
i'll pretend i stepped in beef stroganoff
so i packed it in
stepped in it again
since then, i've gotten all over it
these boots are made for stomping
cat turd minesweeper hunting
smells like a cat parade
somebody was stuntin
that sure as shit ain't biodegradable
but you know what is?
you wanna know what is?
my kiss is
oops i stepped in your cat turd
i'll miss these turds in turn
why does everything always have to end
i'd like a warning, man
i'm still on the mend
if you suddenly crapped out on me
i'd surely cry
so i packed it in
stepped in it again
since then i've gotten all over it
these boots were made for stomping
cat turd minesweeper hunting
smells like a cat parade somebody was stunting
that sure as shit ain't biodegradable
but you know what is?
you wanna know what is?
my warm hug around this cat is
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7. |
pellet
02:32
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pellet
you are my best friend
tell it to me
every little tidbit
i'll eat every birthday cake timbit
cuz i know you hate birthday cake
i'll leave all the chocolate for your sake
i don't like to inconvenience you
when i do, i'm appreciative
if you weren't the first person i dated
you still would've ended up the last
thanks to you for inking all the details in super fast
i'm fortunate i never wandered a torturous path
you guided me with open paws
and love that seeped out through your claws
nobody could tell me otherwise
anyway i'm in love with you
either way you should know i'm so proud of you
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8. |
self checkout
01:59
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start talking back to your boss
take back money that you lost
fake a sick call and get paid
collect tips
it's an asphalt jungle out there
steal from walmart
self checkout their stuff
and if they try to stop you
speak your way out of it
fuck a dream job
that's a scheme stop
don't need a dollar to know that i'm deemed hot
when you see me grinding
know it's in my free time
priorities straight
i only work in the meantime
let's go hangout at the grocery store
veggies misting sparkly dance floor
do the splits in public
i can do a cartwheel trick
when i catcall it sounds like pspsps
everybody likes you
everybody loves you
if i gotta pay a little surplus
at least it's going to a lot of better places
line your pockets
hold me hostage with a bottle rocket
steer clear
i don't know man
i just work here
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9. |
hz ppl
03:30
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the extra change that i found inside my backside pocket
the crumpled 10 dollar bill
that circled the pavement and landed at my feet
i've been rolling through time
like a clumsy tumbleweed
for the past few years
waiting for the haze to clear the way
the other half of my life that's been shoved behind my sockets
i try hard not to forget
like grasping at the faded words
on a long lost receipt
the thunderstorm in my head
sounds just like a raging stampede
it's better to take cover
cuz hurting yourself just hurts people along the way
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10. |
liek dat
02:57
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because we're here to stay
(could've easily packed it up but)
but our bubble inflates
(it's late so shove off with the sharp knife)
i am in love
there's no way
i can't stay away much longer
now i go
just like that
just like that
just like that
i'm starting to feel just like that
i do delete every q
(silent treatment requires some forethought)
that rubs my skin askew
(i'd kindly ask you to stop but let me guess i'm wrong, right?)
why am i always in a rush
i didn't even take shit
never even hit the bush
feel like i'm coming down
now my skin start to gush
squeeze my playdough out my scalp
until somebody says shush
shouts out to the guy that robbed pewdiepie's house
that
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11. |
stupid is as stupid does
02:30
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i guess i ingested too much now i'm congested
40 french fries folded down my neck untested
it felt better pelt hurt harder than my chest so
then we went next door and explored the protesters
next sunday happily
we'll play monopoly
unknowingly practising doom disaster
if i lorded some land
i'd give it up to you faster
leaving a breadcrumb trail home
made with alabaster
don't don't don't wither
(don't wither away)
don't don't don't collapse
(don't collapse)
either i run out of money or go back home
worked 3 years straight can't afford to go
somehow some people like luxury ghettos
tear em all down and install some real domes
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cootie catcher Toronto, Ontario
contact: cootiecatcherband@gmail.com
cooked raw label
artist pic by phillip ly
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